As promised... my dear friend Kaylene:

Kaylene is a deep, close soul friend of mine. She was present at the very beginning of my soul care journey and has been witness to a lot within me.

Kaylene is energetic, powerful, bold, sensitive, and full of peace. She is an enneagram 8. In their brokenness, 8s could have the tendency to squish others, to kind of plow ahead, using others at will instead of appreciating the gifts God has given them.

Not so with Kaylene. Because...as you can guess, Kaylene has chosen to tackle her own dark side. In doing that, Kaylene has become a great leader who is inclusive. She gathers idea, thoughts, desires. She asks for advice and listens to those around her. And when it’s time to make a decision, it’s hard for anyone to remember whose idea it was to begin with -- because it was truly a collaborative effort. Kaylene would not, does not, push her own agenda simply because it is her agenda. She leads with the natural boldness gifted to her, and the gentleness learned from her own personal journey. She is able to do this because (once again I say) she was willing to stand face to face with her own brokenness.

Just as I’ve sat horrified but silenced in the wake of leaders who have led from their brokenness and left a trail of wounded souls behind them, I have also experienced the greatness of leaders who have led from true Goodness. Each of these leaders has done the deep, soul wrenching work of coming face to face with their own brokenness. And instead of fleeing from it, fighting it, or cowering, these great leaders have simply stood. They have stood in the midst of their brokenness, and the wreckage their brokenness created. They have not denied it or made excuses. They have chosen to truly see it, to mourn it, and when the time is right -- to release it.

We must make no mistake, nor take this lightly. This is hard work. At times, it seems soul shattering. It is, in part, the work of reconciling the carnage your broken self has left all around. It is also the work of tending childhood wounds, noticing weakness and places of vulnerability, naming idols and vices and acknowledging the motivation that drives you to them time after time. It is being able to live in the dissonance of already and not yet - being and becoming. And above all else, holding on to the deep, mystical knowledge that who you truly are is so. much. more.

While musing with a friend last night, I thought out loud, “perhaps to the extent that a leader can do great good, they can also do great evil.” Great is great. Deep is deep. The direction we take greatness is ours to decide. History is full of leaders of greatness. Some reflect the goodness of God, some reflect the horror of brokenness.

In my own life, I’ve seen both. Sometimes simultaneously. It’s a great paradox I have marveled at for years. How do I hold and honor the good, when a leader leaves a wake of wounded people behind them?